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Thread: Picking up girls like a douchebag

  1. #1
    Apprentice Footsniffer jediofthefeet's Avatar
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    Picking up girls like a douchebag

    As Archie Bunker sang, "When women were women, and men were men."

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtjBt4Ou9SY

    I think you will be astounded by the results of not being a nice guy.

  2. #2
    Yeah, I'm not buying it. Had to be planned....
    "I'm from trouble"

  3. #3
    God Of Footsniffing sacurason's Avatar
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    99% of these kind of videos are staged, thank God.

    Pretty sick of all the "nice guy" shit on the Web. Nice guys don't finish last. I can attest to that, I finished waaaay out in first. Now, entitled prats, on the other hand? Those guys do finish last.
    "It's an indulgence to sit in a room and discuss your beliefs as if they were a juicy piece of gossip." -Heinlein

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    Administrator ergleburgle's Avatar
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    Now, entitled prats, on the other hand?
    You spend far, far too much time talking to British people.
    Every thought you produce, anything you say, any action you do, it bears your signature.
    -- Thich Nhat Hanh

  5. #5
    God Of Footsniffing sacurason's Avatar
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    That, and reading Harry Potter a lot as a kid

    Besides, some of the words y'all use are just so apt, you know?
    "It's an indulgence to sit in a room and discuss your beliefs as if they were a juicy piece of gossip." -Heinlein

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    The "nice guy" thing started because a lot of people who can't get into relationships and call themselves a "nice guy" do acts of kindness in expectation of something else and act entitled when it doesn't happen, which isn't very nice behaviour.

    The "alpha male" movement that's supposed to contrast this has started to get really annoying in its own right. Being a confident douche works on some girls, but those girls are usually daft, classless and lack self-respect.

  7. #7
    Administrator ergleburgle's Avatar
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    Quite, although I think (he said, making a not very good job of hiding his own personal investment in this topic) that a lot of people can't get into relationships and notice that there are people (who don't deserve it) that are doing a great deal better than they are. Yes, I absolutely agree that there are a lot of men out there who do the short-cut "Poor little me, all I do is GIVE and I get treated so badly - I guess nice guys always finish last!" to make themselves seem pathetic, or because their warped sense of reality figures that a very shallow impression of being "nice" should earn them endless sex with supermodels and then they get pissed off when it doesn't happen.

    I don't think they're the majority, though.

    There's the "nice guy" who actually is a nice guy - but isn't a conspicuous guy. He isn't full of confidence. He isn't really easy to get to know. On the surface, he seems bland - and out there in the "meat market" that is modern dating, he doesn't stand a chance against Chad Thundercock. Chad can treat 50 women like shit, get slapped in the face 49 times, and manage to score with the 50th - but our inconcpicuous, peripherally bland hypothetical friend asks nobody, doesn't get slapped, but only scores with his right hand.

    He can offer a philosophical, artistic mind, kindness, love, attentiveness, and humour - but Chad is simple, loud, smiley, cock-sure, he works out a lot, and he can fit in with your simple, loud, smiley, cock-sure, gym-loving social circle.

    As a very unscientific thought, it seems that Chad will get more sex, but a poorer quality relationship. For Chad, it's easy come, easy go.

    Even though you know that, it's still galling and massively crushing of your self esteem to see that the guy who is unencumbered by all the things that make you unique... also tends to get the girl, repeatedly and reliably - and will laugh in your face as he goes out on his fifteenth date this week with one of the five different girlfriends he's currently shuffling - at least two of whom are girls who turned you down and who are now getting cheated on by the guy with the big smile, the small brain, and the even smaller heart. It makes you feel like the simpler you are, the simpler life is - and that hurts.

    I (yeah, I admit it, I'm talking about myself) didn't ask to be a comparatively short guy. I didn't ask to think too much, or worry too much, or prefer the subtle and the beautiful over the loud and bland. I didn't ask to be intimidated by people I know are dicks, but still be intimidated because I see them winning. But that's what nature gave me.
    Every thought you produce, anything you say, any action you do, it bears your signature.
    -- Thich Nhat Hanh

  8. #8
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    Hey, I'm no "player" myself. I, too, suffered from confidence issues and it took reaching my 20s to be able to actually talk to girls that I liked. Just today I watched a video where comedian Jon Richardson said and I'm paraphrasing "I can't just go flirt with a random girl. I'd rather hand her a list of what I'm good and shit at and leave her to decide". That's usually where I find myself still.

    Quote Originally Posted by ergleburgle View Post
    It makes you feel like the simpler you are, the simpler life is - and that hurts.
    That goes beyond just relationships, does it not? People who don't think about consequences and can't calculate risks that are involved tend to have the most fun simply because they throw themselves into things without care. So is life.
    Last edited by SavourtheSavour; 16-09-2017 at 12:11 AM.

  9. #9
    God Of Footsniffing sacurason's Avatar
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    there are people (who don't deserve it) that are doing a great deal better than they are.
    Perhaps your definition of better and mine are not quite the same, my friend.

    I don't think they're the majority, though.
    I certainly don't think they are. I think there are a lot, though. And frankly, I feel like a lot of them pretty heavily objectify women. That sense of entitled expectation many have makes my skin crawl. I used to be that way myself. Not the best person.

    Chad can treat 50 women like shit, get slapped in the face 49 times, and manage to score with the 50th
    As a very unscientific thought, it seems that Chad will get more sex, but a poorer quality relationship.
    also tends to get the girl, repeatedly and reliably
    In that case, is Chad really doing better than you? Or is his entire attitude just a facade, an attempt to fill some lack of real fulfillment with endless sex? He's not getting relationships...he's fucking. He thinks he's happy. Maybe he'll have to remember these days fondly, because his chances of growing old with someone, his chances of finding real love in this world are slim to none.

    They're not winning. And moreover, why are you bothering to compare yourself to them? You're worth more than that, so much more.

    but our inconcpicuous, peripherally bland hypothetical friend asks nobody
    How does one fall into relationships without asking? The key is to try.

    In the end, I don't think the issue is Chad. I think the issue is you, or let's say us in this case. Chad's out there scoring with women that turned you down? Great. Fuck him and fuck them, because the women who are bothering to get into relationships with Chad are the people with whom you could never be happy with. Those women still have growing up to do, still have to realize that Chad really is an asshole, and nothing more.

    You are not on a comparison scale from Chad to ergle, your relationships are your own and you are you - I understand that seeing that sucks, but you are not tied to Chad or these people who reject you. Move on.

    There are fantastic people out there who think just like you, and guess what? Many are just as shy as you think you are, many of them think they're just as bland and uninteresting as you think you are.

    I'm rambling here. I think you probably get my point if I've been at all coherent.
    "It's an indulgence to sit in a room and discuss your beliefs as if they were a juicy piece of gossip." -Heinlein

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by sacurason View Post
    because the women who are bothering to get into relationships with Chad are the people with whom you could never be happy.
    Bingo. This is why there's no reason to feel sad about it all.

  11. #11
    Administrator ergleburgle's Avatar
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    Oh, I know exactly what you mean - there's perfectly straight logic and there's the raw, instinctual way you occasionally react to things - only sometimes are the two joined in any way, and when you're in the midst of a raw, instinctual reaction you can completely know it's wrong, fully understand the reasons why, and STILL feel like shit.

    That's not necessarily a problem with ME - it's a problem with the way humans are wired. We respond incorrectly to the things around us.
    Every thought you produce, anything you say, any action you do, it bears your signature.
    -- Thich Nhat Hanh

  12. #12
    God Of Footsniffing sacurason's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ergleburgle View Post
    Oh, I know exactly what you mean - there's perfectly straight logic and there's the raw, instinctual way you occasionally react to things - only sometimes are the two joined in any way, and when you're in the midst of a raw, instinctual reaction you can completely know it's wrong, fully understand the reasons why, and STILL feel like shit.

    That's not necessarily a problem with ME - it's a problem with the way humans are wired. We respond incorrectly to the things around us.
    Yeah, I get what you mean - I was just hoping that your logic wasn't running the same way as your instincts, you know? It's hard to rewire those sort of emotions. I don't know if there's really a way to force it, or if you just sort of cope until it gets better.

    Either way, when you take an action against something that affects you negatively, it tends to help. Anything, any conscious choice to try and make things go your way at all, can make you feel better.
    "It's an indulgence to sit in a room and discuss your beliefs as if they were a juicy piece of gossip." -Heinlein

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