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Thread: I'm a hypocrite

  1. #1
    Silent but Deadly
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    I'm a hypocrite

    My daughter who is now 4 is clearly into feet. She wants to make people smell hers and she wants to smell other peoples as well. But here is the problem. I hate it. And I know that makes me a hypocrite.

    Just recently out the blue she asked me if I liked stinky socks. I told her I didn't but she was sure I did. I'm lying but I have no clue how else to go about this. When she tries to put her foot into my face it honestly repulses me. I know it isn't that serious and I'm trying to not make a fuss.

    The other day I tried to joke with her. I took off my shoes and said my feet stink while pinching my nose. She did the same thing and then asked me if I wanted to smell hers. I know her comments are innocent and one day she may make some someone very happy. But it seems I might have to deal with these comments for at least a few more years and I really don't know how to best handle it. My only idea is to take a deep breath and try to redirect her into something else. What I don't want to do is make her feel weird. And I also don't want to lie to her either.

    Is this type of stuff in any of the parenting guides?

  2. #2
    I don't think it's so odd that a small child is curious about foot smell. The first thing they usually try to put in their mouth as a baby are their toes and I don't know ANYONE who hasn't played the "Ewww! Your feet stink!" game when undressing or changing a baby.

    Don't freak out too much. It's probably a phase and she will be on to something else soon:-)
    "I'm from trouble"

  3. #3
    Silent but Deadly
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    I think your right. Still, for a guy with a foot fetish it does put a very different viewpoint on such a game.

  4. #4
    God Of Footsniffing
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    Without making a big thing out of it, I think you should tell her it's not nice to ask anyone to smell her feet, and maintain your stance on this.

  5. #5
    Administrator ergleburgle's Avatar
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    You're not a hypocrite, and I think this situation is easier to deal with than you'd think.

    The feet thing makes you uncomfortable because something that's completely meaningless to most people and is a really common source of nothing more than gross-out fun for kids... has proximity to a big part of your sexuality.

    You are overthinking.

    Imagine you didn't have a foot fetish, and feet have no meaning to you beyond their purpose of supporting your weight when you walk. To your daughter, smelly feet are just funny. Daddy's smelly feet are funny. That's it. She doesn't mean anything by it, and by playing along in a completely natural, ordinary way, you're not going to mess her up and you're not being a bad father. Take it the way it's intended and remember where it's coming from - crude humour, and inelegant attempts by a toddler to bond with her dad.

    She's four. This will be a big deal for her for precisely thirty seconds before her attention moves to other things.
    Every thought you produce, anything you say, any action you do, it bears your signature.
    -- Thich Nhat Hanh

  6. #6
    God Of Footsniffing sacurason's Avatar
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    What ergle said. Both of my little brothers had a similar phase. I'm fairly sure that many toddlers do. Sexuality isn't really a thing for a four year-old anyways.

    Don't freak out too much, my friend. You're gonna be fine
    "It's an indulgence to sit in a room and discuss your beliefs as if they were a juicy piece of gossip." -Heinlein

  7. #7
    Apprentice Footsniffer
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    Ergle said it well. I will add that I have a four year old niece that went through a phase about a year and a half ago.

    My wife and I babysat her a bunch of times during the summer of 2015, and for a couple of months her favorite activity was having me give her horsey rides on my back (completely normal for most kids, as her older brothers used to like this as well). I would crawl around with her on my back and then when i got tired, I would collapse to the floor and she would laugh. She would stand next to me as I laid on the floor and wait for me to roll over onto my back...then she'd step onto my stomach and giggle hysterically while I groaned and grunted. Now of course she didn't weigh much so she wasn't really hurting me, but my painful reaction to her standing on my stomach or chest was very amusing to her.

    As someone with a foot fetish who enjoys being trampled, this particular activity was a little weirder to me than it should have been. But I played it off as a game and sure enough, by the end of last summer she ceased having any interest in stepping on me. Although she still gets a good laugh if I pretend that something she does to me hurts. Maybe she's just a sadist. ;-)

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